I’m Pregnant, What Should I Do?
Here at Heartfelt we offer you the truth and facts about adoption. We are here to listen and help you make the very best decision for you and your unborn child. A decision that only you can make. We promise only to guide you, support you, and answer all your questions truthfully so you can make your decision. You should never feel pressured by anyone to parent or place for adoption. We have counselors on hand for you to talk through your feelings with. If you ultimately decide adoption is the best route for you, we are happy to guide you thru the process so that you feel supported along the way. If parenting is the best choice for you, we can guide you to some services that may be out there to help you.
What is adoption?
Adoption is the legal procedure by which a child becomes, through court action, part of a family other than that of his or her birth parents. The placement of the child is permanent, and all parental rights are legally transferred to the adoptive parents. This means the adoptive parents will have all the rights and responsibilities of biological parents. Similarly, the adopted children will have all the legal, emotional, and social benefits of biological children. The adoption process begins only when the birth mother gives her consent for the child to be placed in another family which happens no earlier then 48 hours after the birth of the baby.
What Are The Different Types Of Adoptions?
There are three types of adoptions: Open, Semi Open, and Closed.
An open adoption allows the birth mother to develop an ongoing relationship with the adoptive parents and is based on trust and good communication. The amount of contact depends on what the birth parents decide. In a lot of cases, the birth mothers develop very strong relationships with the adoptive parents and continue to be part a of the child’s life as they grow up. This includes visits, phone calls, emails, pictures, letters, and social media connections.
A semi open adoption is everything above, but with out the visits. Birth mom still builds a very strong relationship if she pleases with the adoptive parents, they communicate via text, email, or phone for updates and photos, but they just do not have that yearly or bi yearly visit requirement.
A closed adoption is a form of adoption in which the biological parents have no direct contact with the adoptive family, and the adoptive parents often know little or nothing about the biological parents.
What services are available to me?
Heartfelt Adoptions provides comprehensive support services to ensure that the birth mother feels loved and supported throughout the adoption and after placement. Our counselors are here to answer all your questions and provide all the necessary guidance. We also help with medical and living expenses, transportation to doctor’s appointment, personal and professional care. Our individual plans are tailored according to your specific needs. Our goal at heartfelt is that when you leave us you feel equipped and ready to handle the world.
Can I choose the adoptive family?
Yes. We have many hopeful couples that are waiting to adopt. This gives you the option of choosing a family which you think is the best fit for you and for your child. We also recommend once you choose your family that communication start right away to ensure you build a strong relationship with one another. We can even arrange a meeting with the family so everyone can meet in person. We want to ensure you feel that you made the very best decision when choosing the adoptive family.
Is adoption a selfish act?
No. It is one of the greatest acts of self-sacrifice that a person can go through. Our agency holds no truer words then the fact that you are not “giving up” your child, but that you are “giving more.” You are giving your child more than you can provide him/her right now. Adoption can be a loving decision that allows you to make the best decisions for your child. Knowing that you are doing what is best for your child will provide you the strength you need.
What does adoption look like today?
You might be wondering what Adoption looks like today versus what adoption was many years ago. I can tell you it’s vastly different. Today you have many choices. Choices such as:
- Choosing the adoptive couple and even meeting and talking to them during your pregnancy.
- You can continue to get updates about your child after he/she has been placed with the family you chose that is called a semi open adoption.
- If you choose an open adoption on top of pictures and updates, we can establish yearly visits so you can watch your child grow every year.
- Opportunity to communicate with your child through the years and share your history and thoughts.
- While in the hospital you can hold your baby, care for your baby, name your baby etc.
- You have a choice on receiving consoling through our agency.
- If you need financial assistance, it’s your choice if you would like us to assist you with practical need such as rent, food, clothing, phone, utilities etc. This assistance is thru the pregnancy and up to 6 weeks post-partum.
Does the birth father have to be involved?
No. The birth father does not have to be present. It is preferable to have medical, social, professional, and educational information about the birth father to provide the adoptive parents with a complete history of the child. If the identity and whereabouts of the birth father are known, then he will have to be informed about this decision, but he is not required to be involved. If birth father is unknown, then we have other legal ways to move forward in that situation.
What will people think of me?
People who truly love you will support your decision. Regardless of this matter, you should make the decision which is best for you and your child. There will always be people who may not approve of the choices you make in life whether they are related to adoption or any other matter. However, this should not deter you from taking a rational approach to a decision that you will have to live with for the rest of your life. Whatever option you choose, you must remain committed to it and reassure yourself that it was your responsibility to secure the future of your child.
What if I don’t want to meet the adoptive parents?
That’s OK. Some birth mothers feel that it may be an uncomfortable experience for them to meet with the adoptive family. You are not required to do so if you are not willing. Our counselors will help you through every decision.
Is there any cost to me?
No. The adoption will not cost you anything. The adoptive parents will pay for all costs related to the adoption process.
Can the adoptive parents help me with my expenses?
Yes. The adoptive parents can help you with your expenses. The Florida statutes allows living (housing, basic utilities, food and transportation), medical, legal and counseling expenses to be paid by the adoptive parent during the pregnancy. However, the amounts when exceeding a certain limit will have to be approved by court.